Effective Ways to Communicate with Your Loved One with Memory Problems

Communicating with your loved one who is living with memory problems can be challenging. But with the right strategies, you can bridge the gap and foster a more engaging relationship. Whether you have been struggling to communicate with your loved one with memory problems for a long time or the communications struggles have started recently, we’ve outlined strategies that can help you cope and be more successful.

What You Should Avoid

• Don’t ask questions. Your loved one with memory problems can construe even the basics of conversation starters as an actual question. 
• Never counter aggressive behavior. At times, someone living with dementia might become aggressive in response to their environment. When angered, they are in a way saying: “Pay attention to me. I don’t want that!” 
• Don’t say “can’t,” “no,” or “don’t.” These words can create resistance. So, stay positive with them and never tell them they can’t do a task. 
• Don’t talk down to them. Do not talk to them like they are children, or sound condescending. 
• Don’t say, “do you recall?” This expression will trigger your loved one’s fear of failing. Instead, rephrase the expression like: “You know, I was thinking you said you liked it.”
  

What You Should Do

• Use the senses. Use your senses as conversation starters. Know what they like to see, smell, taste, hear, or feel, and use them. 
• Use non-verbal communication. Body language speaks volumes when words fail. So, keep an eye on your loved one’s body language. They can reveal a feeling of discomfort, anger, distress, or sadness. When you notice any, redirect the discussion to something more appealing. 
• Be careful with your tone. Words said with a loving tone will be better understood by your loved one than those with a harsh tone. 
• Speak in short sentences. Utilize simple sentences. If you need to use questions, keep it brief and ensure they are “yes” or “no” questions.
  

Communicating with a loved one with memory problems has its challenges. But these techniques can help your loved ones with memory problems will maintain their confidence and self-worth.